Boofonomics

Lawsuit alleges breach of deal. Investors just relieved someone still wants to buy weed from them at all.

With a 30% combined cannabis tax rate, the Land of 10,000 Lakes just became the Land of 10,000 Regrettable Receipts

We recycle failure — and rebrand it with better fonts. The Tears-to-Mylar™ Buyback Program. A place where broken dreams go to get laminated

Wall Street delusion meets bodega weed reality as New York cannabis bros finally discover what supply and demand actually means.

Investors stunned as Germany’s most trusted candy accidentally outperforms half the cannabis industry by simply fucking up a batch of gummies.

Built on Vibes, Funded by Excuses, Sued by Everyone

Joe Rogan said modern weed is weird, and now your dispensary’s a tactical smoothie bar

Inside the high-margin illusion of Massachusetts cannabis—where brands pay influencers before landlords, and still act surprised when the eviction notice hits.

Inside the recycled grift of 818 Brands, where failed LED startups and mid-tier flower get repackaged as a premium lifestyle cult for the chronically gullible.

How a cannabis company with $100 million in revenue proved you can scale anything if you never pay anyone and lie convincingly enough on a deck.

Cannabis CEOs Cut Jobs, Raise Prices, and Call It ‘Operational Discipline'

Bill Could End Longstanding Government Tradition of Making Shit Up About Weed

Texas Is Selling Legal THC. They Just Haven’t Told The Cops Yet.

When Both Sides of the War on Drugs Are Funded by the Same Guy in Sunglasses

A Case Study in Overbranding, Underdelivering, and Executive-Level Delusion

A Celebration of Excellence in Corporate Cliff-Diving, Cash Burn Rates, and the Art of Saying “We’re Fine” While Actively On Fire

“Aye, the pension wasn’t cutting it. Plus, I got tired of making jam.”

Margins Are Sky-High. Patients Are Broke. And the Market Calls It “Progress.”

Cannabis Commerce as Designed by a Toll Booth

Do Not Invest, Do Not Pass GO, Do Not Let This Man Near A Farm Again

A visionary in creative math, Acreage’s CFO bypasses traditional reporting in favor of vibes, ambition, and whatever QuickBooks lets you rename.

With no rules, no accountability, and absolutely no one watching the wheel, New York’s weed supply chain has entered its final form: pure spiritual entropy with a retail markup.

While regulators nap and brands rebrand, CCELL quietly steamrolls the vape game—one patented cartridge and offshore production run at a time.

After years of strategic mismanagement and vibes-based accounting, Celadon’s top brass gracefully retreat into the shadows—purely coincidentally, as subpoenas begin to arrive.

With markets in freefall and retirement accounts turning to mulch, experts now recommend dumping your savings into solventless extracts and hoping for the best.

They’ve got vaults full of cash, nowhere to put it, and CFOs learning how to Venmo vendors from burner phones. Welcome to weed’s unbanked billionaire problem.

Each NFT captures a proud moment in HEXO’s long tradition of spending big, due diligencing never, and calling it “strategic growth” through gritted teeth.

After years of mastering vertical integration and vertical facial tension, Rivers trades shareholder calls for sword fights, bringing the same energy—just with better lighting.

Compiled while staring at a Cookies receipt and questioning everything

Analysts call it “a bold return to the cash-and-crumbs model that built the empire.”